Avoid #1 killer of relationship

King's family problem

Story behind the scene Ark of the Covenant

Michal - Sauls Daughter

Greatest mistake that people make?

What did Michal need?

What did she do to get what she want?

Michal mistakes

Time

Approach - tone

Strategy

4 horsemen of the opacolypse

• Criticism
• Contempt
• Stonewalling
• Defensiveness

Contempt - Sulphuric acid of relationships

Contempt

• Making yourself look right and the other look like an idiot or moron

Elements of Contempt

• Scorn
• Dehumanise
• Disdain
• Despise
• Disrespect
• Subhuman - superior attitude
• Looking down your nose

How it looks

• Mockery - correcting your english
• Sarcasm
• Hostile humour
• Eye rolls
• Character assicination - name calling
• Insults

Impact of contempt - Kill your spouse

In bitterness of her passion she went out to meet him, but to his kindly greetings poured forth a torrent of bitter words. Keen and cutting was the irony of her words. PP800

Why?

Sarcasm only symptom

Another reason - Culture and environment

Frustration and bitterness - why?

David manly response - defensiveness

Antidote

Gratitude

Appreciation

Each see the other as better then themselves Phil 2:5-7