Have you ever met the engineer that doesn't like math or is not good at it?

The nurse who hates science or anything science related?

The lawyer who hates writing or dealing with people.

This presentation is aimed at trying to help advisors get students through the entry and progression levels.

a. Everyone write down the 4 things you are best at or know the most about
b. Put a check mark beside each one that someone supported you on
c. Put a check mark beside each one someone doubted you would ever do or complete

We decided to use the Kubler-Ross model on dealing with grief. These steps are not sequential. They are fluid. Students can go through some and not others at different periods.

i. In grief-is this really happening. Can I stop this?
ii. For students-I still have a chance. I can just do what I did before.

i. In grief-Lashing out because of the situation. Being angry at people or situations that have nothing to do with what they are feeling.
ii. For students-Use a victim mentality. You are trying to stop me, you hater!

i. In grief-normal reaction to feelings of helplessness and vulnerability is often a need to regain control
ii. For Students- Students try to make deals with irreversible situations. I promise I will never miss another class or assignment

i. In grief- Sadness and private preparation for what’s to come
ii. For students-Sadness because you will not be able to accomplish the goal you set out to do. This may involve letting down a family member or their own consciousness.

i. In grief-Reach a level of withdrawal and calm.
ii. For students-This can go one of two ways
1. They can accept it and look for the alternative
2. They will withdraw completely and give up all together

Reassure-inform them this is temporary. They need to hear that it's okay. Your bridge will not fall down.

i. Same letters used to spell listen are used to spell silent
ii. Don’t type or look at computer while they are sharing
iii. Mark Twain-“If God wanted us to talk more than listen, he would have given us one ear, and two mouths.”

c. Be Genuine-Quickest way to lose a student is to patronize or insult

d. Unconditional positive regard – Accept how the student feels. Many may react differently. Meet them where they are with a positive and helping attitude.
1. “It’s okay to feel that way.”-Validate Feelings
2. “It’s okay to be disappointed. It’s never okay to be discouraged”
3. “The tongue has no bones but it can break a heart.”

e. Non-judgmental – Take an approach that is not condescending that allows the student to feel empowered by making a different career choice.

f. Empathy – Put yourself in their shoes. Understand where they are coming from and how they feel.-Refer back to 5 things you know best

Scenario 1
You are Darealyst’s advisor. Darelyst’s career goal is to be an author and write children’s books one day. He is a first year student at Durham Tech currently enrolled in DRE-097 for the first mini-session of Fall. He is not passing and will have to retake the course during the 2nd mini session if he fails. He has missed multiple assignments and asked for extensions. He tells you that if you allow him turn in all work by the last week of class that he knows he can pass. What stage would you say Darealyst is going through? How would you advise him?

Scenario 2
Blossom has hopes of becoming a mechanic. She is in her 2nd semester at Durham Tech, and she is having trouble making it to class. It is now the fourth week of classes, and you have a discussion with her letting her know that if she misses one more class she will be withdrawn from the course. She confides in you that her boyfriend, who is also in the class recently broke up with her, and she’s having trouble sleeping at night and getting up for school. However, she assures you that she’s completely over the breakup and will not be absent anymore this semester. What is she experiencing? How would you respond?

Scenario 3
Tammy is a student at Durham Tech. She’s had many unpleasant interactions with instructors and students around campus and tends to have a reputation of being difficult to get along with. Tammy has failed ENG-111 for third time. She will have to get special permission to retake the course. She lashes out saying she’s “Done with Durham Tech,” her instructor “didn’t like her, and treated her unfairly.” “This whole college is a money scam anyway, I’m out of here!” What stage is she experiencing? How would you respond?

Scenario 4
Adaline wants to be a nurse. Her mom is a nurse and her aunt is nurse. She stated that she knew that this was the career for her too, because she likes helping people. This is her third year at Durham Tech. She applied for the nursing program and comes in your office crying because she was not accepted. She says she has “failed at life.” “I’m never going to be a nurse, my mom will be so disappointed.” “I’ve failed my entire family.” What stage is she in? What would you do?

13. Behaviors-Stages of Change-Motivational Interviewing/Substance Abuse Non-linear, Not sequential

"IT ISN'T THAT WE CAN'T SEE THE SOLUTION. IT IS THAT WE CAN'T SEE THE PROBLEM" Feeling hopeless

b. Contemplation- "I WANT TO STOP FEELING SO STUCK"

c. Preparation- Almost there but not quite. Need to come up with a serious plan.

d. Action-This requires the greatest commitment of time and energy

e. Maintenance-Change never ends with action (Diet Example)

a. Positive Language-Saying Yes

Stay positive. Try not to tell a student they can't do something. Talk to them about what they can.

b. Motivational Quotes
i. Don’t let the beatings of yesterday contaminate the beauty of today. Why survive it, if you are not going to get over it.”
ii. “Opportunities are found by those that look for them! The bee has a sting but honey too….so look at every negative and make a positive out of it.”

c. Self-Disclosure-Share your story or someone close to you if you feel it may help. Make sure it is true so you don’t have to remember what you said.

f. Jullien Gordon Activity

d. Eric Thomas-You owe You- Show them the link

SMART Goals

EDISON part

Career Services

Show how to get to assessments

Easy form to fill out.

d. Advertise the Career Services- Director Christy Walker

You and I will go to volunteers and act out one of the students from the scenarios. Have the volunteer give us a strategy to use.

a. Ethnicity
b. Nationalities
c. Socio-economic differences-
d. Disability Awareness
e. LGBTQ