Hello & welcome to part 2 of 'Manage People to Deliver Reliable Results'. Please view part 1 first.

It takes about 4 minutes to just view the slides. It takes about 15-20 minutes to view the slides & read these notes.

Please email your questions or comments to jonathanbiss@gmail.com

Enjoy...

This presentation explains 3 'doorways' that help you apply the 3 keys described in part 1.

DOOR 1: your master mindset of managing people's success (not just performance or results), is a key that helps you move from focusing on the 'people problems' to seeing & engaging people's potential.

DOOR 2: your master skill-set of having effective conversations is a key that helps you move from discussion focused on decisions (usually driven by unconscious habit) to dialogue focused on facilitating full understanding, before then making (usually better) decisions.

DOOR 3: following a proven System is a key that helps you to be calm & confident in how you lead people. For your 'System for Success' conversations to be easily collaborative, you need to move from conversations that try to control people's behaviour (usually unconsciously), to dialogue that helps people review, own & improve the choices they make (that drives their success - or failure).

For new leaders, unexpected 'people problems' can be confusing, frustrating & worrying.

If people issues take all your energy & drain your enjoyment at work - it's difficult to sincerely adopt the mindset of managing people's success, not just their performance or results.

What you chose to focus on (problems or potential) becomes important for your sanity, effectiveness & enjoyment at work.

Do you focus on the people problems or their potential & possibilities?

Leading people is a bit like renovating a house.

It always takes work; usually more than you expect! No matter how well you plan, things come up that you just couldn't predict. There are always frustrating delays or problems.

Renovators are inspired to take on the hard work because of the potential they see. Renovators embrace the current problems, in a practical & pragmatic way. They see through the problems to the potential of what the house can become.

With persistence (& skill), your hard work pays off with huge tangible & intangible rewards. Rewards that make the work & effort enjoyably worthwhile.

Of course, some people can't see through the problems. They don't see any potential. They see a crumbling shack that should be demolished!

The reality is - every person is a mix of 'problems' & potential. Every person is a 'blank canvass' or a raw block of marble - ready to be sculpted.

You need to be willing to accept the current people issues & happily 'chip away' at them while keeping your focus on the potential that you aim to reveal.

If you work with people you have to deal with 'people issues'. Whether you see & experience people as mostly problems or potential has a big impact on your enjoyment & success as a leader.

When you really see people's potential & your ultimate focus is on that - all your conversations tend to engage & encourage that 'part' of people.

The inevitable problems, delays, issues or frustrations of work (& life), are seen within the larger context of success, potential & possibility.

Problems don't take 'centre stage'. They're seen as just part of the on-going process of working toward success. By accepting & constructively dealing with problems, you (usually enjoyably) engage & develop people's potential.

A fundamental part of this approach to managing or leading people is having effective conversations. An effective conversation builds full understanding, gets action towards desired results and maintains or enhances the relationships of those involved.

At work, we often fall into the habit of having 'discussion' - focused on giving instructions, quickly reaching a decision and then taking action. Often - that works perfectly well - the job gets done. AND, often - what's missing is full understanding and people feeling acknowledged, included and 'in relationship'. Too much discussion without dialogue can feel like a 'production line' - impersonal, disconnected & robotic.

It's not about 'good' (dialogue) and 'bad' (discussion). It's about using discussion & dialogue consciously in order to have effective conversations.

The frightening reality is that we have most of our conversations by habit. We talk, relate, communicate, listen and express ourselves with little conscious thought. We have conversations in much the same way we drive a car, or ride a bicycle, or walk down the street.

It's quite easy to get better at conversations by paying attention to our habits & using simple techniques for more effective conversations.

The first step from habits to mastery is to be fully present, 100% attentive, without external or internal distractions when you talk with anyone.

Being fully present with a person is one of the easiest & most powerful ways to convey genuine respect to that person (regardless of what you think or feel about them or the topic). Respect can be given in any moment rather than having to be earned.

Sincere mutual respect is one of the ingredients that makes it safe to engage in dialogue.

The skill of dialogue is perhaps best described in the book "Crucial Conversations: Tools for talking when stakes are high" by Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, Ron McMillan & Al Switzler.

Their use of dialogue is for 'difficult situations'.

The dynamics of 'difficult situations' as the authors describe them (different or opposing opinions, strong feelings & high stakes), are vitally important for you to understand so you can truly master 'effective conversations'.

A routine situation can unexpectedly turn into a difficult situation where you need to use dialogue automatically, without preparation.

Beyond 'difficult situations' - an understanding & ability to engage in dialogue is an ESSENTIAL component of mastering effective conversations. Your ability to engage genuine dialogue with people is a transformative skill. Try it ;-)

For now, there are five elements of dialogue that will help you toward mastering effective conversations.
1. Be aware of & 'shake off' your conversational habits that block dialogue. For example - a) when do you tend to argue or attack & b) when do you tend to withdraw or shut down?
2. Know how to make it safe for everyone to say anything (be honest), & listen to everything (be respectful, open & curious).
3. Know how to unravel your story & theirs.
4. Know how to be fully open minded & curious.
5. Know how to unite the 1st, 2nd & 3rd positions.

There are three 'categories' of habitual behaviour that 'kills' dialogue:
1. Not being fully present. Being distracted &/or disinterested.
2. Trying to convince people that your point of view is better or right. There's a big difference in dialogue between trying to help people fully understand your point of you and trying to get them to agree with it!
3. Not honestly expressing your point of view. Telling people what you think they want to hear or, not telling them your full truth. Of course, your ability to express your point of view fully, honestly AND respectfully - is a skill.

The more difficult the situation, topic or conversation is - the more critical it is to establish enough safety so people can listen fully and speak honestly.

The precise conditions for safety required for each situation are what you need to identify, build and maintain for difficult conversations to be effective dialogue. 'Safety' is a useful label but, you need to establish the specific conditions that each person in the dialogue needs to feel safe enough to engage in honest dialogue.

One of the 'tricks' to fully understanding yourself and other peoples' point of view is to be able to unravel each other's story or perspective on a situation. One way to do this is to pay attention to and respectfully explore the three stories:
1. What happened?
2. How do you feel? What are your concerns?
3. What is the meaning (importance) of all this for you?
4. Is their anything that's important for me to fully understand you, that you're not saying?

We are innately designed to be curious. To learn. To explore. We just need to open ourselves to take in and understand the world or, in the case of dialogue, the other people's points of view. We need to suspend our judgment and to open our mind (head), our feelings (heart), and our intuition (hara or gut). When we listen with all our 'channels' open - head, heart and hara - we can be masterful at engaging and understanding each other.

We are also innately good at being able to put ourselves in the shoes of other people - if we care.

The more difficult the situation, the more opposed our views, the more emotionally charged, or the more judgemental we are of the other people - the more we resist 'sitting in their chair' (the '2nd position')

The '3rd position' - the observer's view can be a way to break our judgment and to open us to the validity of other points of view. We don't have to agree with them - we just need to fully understand them - to the extent that their point of view (from that point of view) makes complete sense!

And, the more 'crazy' a person's point of view is - the only way to understand that person's point of view is to literally see it as they do - to sit in their chair. Try it ...

Sometimes one dialogue is enough. In most situations, it usually requires a number of on-going conversations to achieve success.

When you help people see the impact of their choices on their results, or success, or happiness, progress, effectiveness, etc - they're able to take ownership, control & responsibility of their life (& results) through the power of their choices.

This approach is based on the work of William Glasser who developed 'Choice Theory'. He provides an alternative to our usual (mostly habitual & unconscious) approach of trying to control people's behaviour (& their thoughts, feelings, responses, performance, etc).

Rather than trying to control, persuade, motivate or engage people to do what you want (all forms of control), you guide conversations that review, reflect on & provide insight into the impact of their choices & the (usually many) alternative choices that would provide better results, or more satisfaction, ease, cooperation, creativity, etc.

We have an interesting relationship with 'control'. It is deeply ingrained into our psyche & culture.

On one hand we have a deep, strong and often unconscious need to control our world and the people around us.

On the other hand we have a deep, strong and often unconscious resentment & resistance to being controlled.

What do you think?

One way to reduce the unconscious and unnecessary level of control is to change your mindset from (controllingly) managing people's performance or results to cooperatively managing people's success. It's a different intention, role and relationship.

Follow the daily series of 5 sensible conversations described in part 1 and set up and follow the formal, semi-formal and informal structure described in part 1.

Follow the system and allow the system to do a lot of the 'hard work' for you.

The basic 'philosophy' behind choice theory is that, people ALWAYS make the best choice they can at the time, given the situation, circumstance & perspective they have.

We can only choose one alternative (from the choices we see at the time). That choice may be effective & support our success or, it may be less effective than we hoped or expected. Either way - we all 'do the best we can - with what we've got - at the time'.

So, hindsight is a wonderful teacher and a wonderful way to manage people to be more successful - by helping them reflect on, see and own the impact of their choices, to learn the lessons (with the wisdom of hindsight), and to identify alternative choices that are likely to get a better result.

To have this conversation effectively - we need to understand what drives our choices ...

There are many models, frameworks, theories & philosophies that can help you understand yourself & other people.

If you want to master managing or leading people - I recommend you get fascinated about what 'makes people tick' and embark on a life-long exploration of trying to understand yourself & other people. More on this in the presentation on 'Being Authentic'.

The following 'iceberg model' is useful for new leaders who need people to perform well & deliver reliable results ...

As you look at each level of this model (& read these notes) consider a recent situation when you achieved a good result & a situation when you didn't achieve a good result.

At the tip of the 'iceberg' we have the person's results. This can be moment to moment or daily, weekly, whatever timeframe we're considering.

In this model - a person's results are driven by their individual performance.

Their performance is driven by their behaviour, their actions (and 'non-actions'), moment to moment & over time. A series of behaviours drives performance which drives their results.

Behaviour is driven (according to this model) by our thoughts & feelings - which are beneath the surface of the water (on the inside of the person) - suggesting we can't see these thoughts or feelings directly. We can only make assumptions on what a person is thinking & feeling by what we see 'on the outside' (above the water), in their behaviour - posture, facial expression, words, actions, etc.

A person's thoughts and feelings are driven (according to this model), by their internal 'Bank' of knowledge, skills and experience that is relevant to their situation at the time. If they have useful knowledge, skills and experience - they are likely to feel confident about the situation they face and think they can handle the situation well. If they do not have useful knowledge, skills or experience within their inner 'bank' - they will feel less confident and will simply do the best they can to handle the situation. We make the best choice we can.

The knowledge, skills and experience a person maintains in their inner 'bank' will be driven by their attitude or mindset to the knowledge, skills and experience they are exposed to. If they are not interested or have a negative mindset toward specific knowledge, skills or experience - they are unlikely to maintain that within their inner memory 'bank' of knowledge, skills & resources.

A person's attitude or mindset (toward anything) is driven (according to this model) by their core beliefs and values. If they value something - they will have a positive attitude toward knowledge of that topic or 'thing' whatever it is. If they don't value something - they will have a neutral or negative attitude toward that topic or 'thing'. Whatever we value and believe - we tend to make (mostly habitual & unconscious) effort to support those values and beliefs.

Our values and beliefs can be both positive and negative, constructive and destructive. For example, a person can value 'hard work'. They will have an attitude, skills, knowledge, thoughts, feelings and behaviour that supports this core belief. The opposite is also true if they don't value 'hard work' or believe 'working hard' is foolish; their attitude, skills, knowledge, thoughts, feelings & behaviour will support them to avoid hard work. They may become very good at taking advantage of the efforts of others!

According to this model - a person's beliefs and values are driven by their personality preferences. For example, if a person is a big picture thinker - they will value strategic thinking and will undervalue detailed thinking. If a person is task oriented, they will focus on task details and completion rather than people or relationships.

The core of this model (which is not labelled on the slide) is that each level of the model is driven by a person's choices. The red arrows represent choice points. According to this model (you decide if you agree or not), we choose our behaviour. We choose our thoughts and feelings. We choose the skills, knowledge & experience we maintain in our internal memory 'bank'. We choose our attitude. We choose our beliefs and values. Some say - we choose our personality!??

It is generally agreed amongst 'the experts' that as the model goes deeper 'under the surface' and into the depths of our personal iceberg - our choices are more unconscious and habitual. For example, our personality preferences have become 'hard wired' into us because we repeat them constantly without thought.

Our core beliefs and values are so ingrained that we are barely aware of them until someone transgresses one of our core values and we respond with automatic & 'irrational' passion (or righteousness)!

To free us from merely reacting to our external or internal stimuli or situation - there is a saying ...

"Between every 'stimulus' (situation) and our 'response' is always a tiny gap - in which we have a brief moment to choose our response. In that gap and with our choice of response (or reaction) - we create our future - moment by moment, choice by choice, for better or worse".

The next slide talks about the power of choice - and our ability to use our internal 'pause button' to take control of (more of) our choices and thereby more consciously choose our response & create our present & our future more successfully.

"Between every 'stimulus' and our 'response' is always a tiny gap - in which we have a brief moment to choose our response. And, within that gap and with our choice - we create our future - moment by moment, choice by choice, for better or worse".

We all have the ability to press our personal 'pause button' and make our choices more consciously, less reactively or habitually. This is the basic path to all personal development & change - making different choices that give us a better performance or result or feeling, thought or attitude, etc.

As a leader you can guide conversations to help people reflect on, understand, take ownership for and learn from their choices. You can use the iceberg model quite overtly if you are comfortable with this. Show people the model (it is widely known & used) and talk with them about recent past situations when their results and performance were good or great and, when results were not as good as expected. A basic structure and process for these 'reviewing choices' conversations is:

1. Agree a specific situation relating to a result, performance or behaviour to review & reflect on.
2. Clarify the actual situation so you are both 'on the same page' for your conversation.
3. Ask conversational questions (using the iceberg model as a guide), about the choices they made in relation to this situation and leading up to this result. For example;
- how did they feel, what did they think at specific times relating to this situation and how did those thoughts and feeling affect their actions and effectiveness?
- What was their attitude, their level of confidence like and, how did this affect their performance and results?
- What actions and behaviour worked well for them and what actions and behaviour were not as effective as they hoped?
- What were their beliefs and values relating to this situation and did those beliefs and values help or hinder them to be successful?
- What personality preferences helped & hindered them in this situation?

You can have a very interesting and useful conversation exploring their choices and the impact of those choices 'up and down' all parts of the iceberg - provided you relate each part of the model to a specific situation and moment in time.

As human beings we are constantly making choices on what we think, feel and do. Most of these choices are habitual and unconscious. That's why having an effective conversation to reflect on our choices can be so enlightening and useful. Once we are conscious of our choices and their impact - we gain the wisdom and personal ownership to identify and make better choices - to be more successful.

As a leader - your ability to set people up to succeed and support them to be successful by having relatively simple, sensible and systematic conversations is greatly enhanced by helping people to reflect on and learn from their choices.

The iceberg model helps you to avoid superficial conversations only about results and performance ('above the water'). The iceberg model helps you to go deeper and help people understand what is driving their choices (and results), and how to make better choices to be more successful. You don't need to control people's behaviour. You need to help people understand the impact of their ('did the best they could at the time') choices and identify better choices that will be more successful.