Love this question. Important. Used fall theme--time of year, and how to stay vibrant instead of tired and worn.
Thought it would be helpful to hear from fellow staff member who works with individuals in tough times, too.

The pumpkins represent each story you hear. They are unique, and placed on your "ledge." You are trusted to hold up, strong. What types of stories are being shared?

I understand that you are seeing more and more potentially critical situations. Let's talk about what you can do in the unpredictable moment.

Water is important in tough conversations. If you feel an appointment becoming intense, get a bottle of water for you and offer one to the student.

When sharing information, state the facts, and share as much as you can. Honesty is best. Do NOT say "everything is going to be OK"...because you don't know.

Be clear about your concerns and be clear about your actions. If you are seeking assistance from another person or area, communicate that. The person across the table is likely not thinking clearly, so you need to make the effort to think clearly for both of you.

What do you do with those "pumpkins?" How does it affect you at work? Do you carry them home?

(Share about how I leave my "stuff" at the door...unless I reallllly need to discuss in order to be vibrant tomorrow.)

I want to talk about 3 words that are used interchangeably, each have their place in our work, but are also distinct... and understanding the distinctions may be helpful to our staying restored.

Helping. How would you define this?

There is a perceived inequality...you have skills, resources, connections that the other one across the desk or on the phone does not have.

What are some examples of helping?

Helping others is certainly a piece of what we do everyday, but with the mindset of inequality...constantly being the one with the answers...it can be draining.

Fixing. How would you define it?

In this case, we perceive something in the other's world or experience as "broken." It usually requires action on our part. The inequality of expertise between the two individuals can cause disconnection and we may judge the other's circumstance or choices. This, too, has a role in our days, but it can become very draining.

Examples of fixing?

Serving. How would you define it?

Serving facilitates connection, understanding. It may LOOK the same as helping or fixing, but the perspective is different, and both sides feel it.

Service strengthens and renews both parties. When we have a serving mindset, our work self-sustains.

How do you "serve" in your capacity? How can it be unique from helping and fixing?

Listen (share the 3 listens/1 talk)
Provide resources
Empathize (avoid sympathizing...it creates inequality)

What campus resources are you aware of?

I will provide links to several via Allison's newsletter tomorrow.

This is important to make time to do. Here are some options.

What types of things do you enjoy? Let's brainstorm?

Going back to serving, and reflecting on differences from the helping and fixing perspectives. Helping and fixing put the emphasis on you...what YOU are responsible to make better for another person. Serving shifts that to the focus of caring for the "other"...which somehow is sustaining to us, and truly helps heal another's situation. Also, I looked up your core values...I saw that under your first value...Exceeding expectations...was the commitment to serve.